Billy Bob Ben Jo Holcombe's Messy Ordeal
Today was a Wonderful Day for Myrtle and I.
It was the first day She wasen't crying when She got off the bus.
It was also the first day the bus Driver actually dropped Myrtle off in front of the House and Not down the road and across the street ( She was making her cross the highway, hoping she would get run over)
Myrtle came a skipping up the lane, moving faster than I have ever saw her. It was like a Rainbow was over our house or something.( that night I looked outside to make sure there wasen't two Moons ) As she came up to the House and Climbed over the fence, She had this ridiculous grin on her face, even more ridiculous than usual.
I reached down and grabbed her tail and slung her up on my shoulder and gave her a big kiss and said " whats got you in such a good mood "
Of course She diden't answer, She just reached in her pouch and pulled out a note from the Teacher.
It read as follows:
Dear Mr Jones:
Upon eating the Brownies you sent to School with Myrna ( Thats Myrtle you stupid ##@$**## I thought ) Billy Bob Ben Jo Holcombe, had a serious Explosive bowel movement all over Class. We are suspicious of the ingredients in the Brownies, since there was an Ex-Lax wrapper stuck to the bottom of one of them. We contacted Bill Bob Ben Jo Holcombe's Mother about the incident, And she planning on a full investigation with the School Board.
The Superintendant ( I think thats how you spell it ) will be contacting you soon.
As I finished reading it I could Hear Myrtle Snickering in the Background.
It felt good to have something happen to somebody else's kid besides mine for a change.
Now I know why you are so Happy today Young Lady. I said.
All of a sudden I smelled Shit, And I realized it wasent because Billy Bob Ben Jo Holcombe had messed all over the place that myrtle was so Happy, It was because She had hid some of the Brownies in her pouch,and had ate them, and she had Shit all over herself, And was in anticipation of cleaning it all up for a Midnight Snack.
Even Children that you Love can be absolutely Gross sometimes.
I'm starting to get sick on my stomach just thinking about it. So I'd better Go for now
Myrtle has Cheerleader tryouts tommorow, It will take a real good nights sleep to deal with that .
Sincerely
Myrtles Father
It was the first day She wasen't crying when She got off the bus.
It was also the first day the bus Driver actually dropped Myrtle off in front of the House and Not down the road and across the street ( She was making her cross the highway, hoping she would get run over)
Myrtle came a skipping up the lane, moving faster than I have ever saw her. It was like a Rainbow was over our house or something.( that night I looked outside to make sure there wasen't two Moons ) As she came up to the House and Climbed over the fence, She had this ridiculous grin on her face, even more ridiculous than usual.
I reached down and grabbed her tail and slung her up on my shoulder and gave her a big kiss and said " whats got you in such a good mood "
Of course She diden't answer, She just reached in her pouch and pulled out a note from the Teacher.
It read as follows:
Dear Mr Jones:
Upon eating the Brownies you sent to School with Myrna ( Thats Myrtle you stupid ##@$**## I thought ) Billy Bob Ben Jo Holcombe, had a serious Explosive bowel movement all over Class. We are suspicious of the ingredients in the Brownies, since there was an Ex-Lax wrapper stuck to the bottom of one of them. We contacted Bill Bob Ben Jo Holcombe's Mother about the incident, And she planning on a full investigation with the School Board.
The Superintendant ( I think thats how you spell it ) will be contacting you soon.
As I finished reading it I could Hear Myrtle Snickering in the Background.
It felt good to have something happen to somebody else's kid besides mine for a change.
Now I know why you are so Happy today Young Lady. I said.
All of a sudden I smelled Shit, And I realized it wasent because Billy Bob Ben Jo Holcombe had messed all over the place that myrtle was so Happy, It was because She had hid some of the Brownies in her pouch,and had ate them, and she had Shit all over herself, And was in anticipation of cleaning it all up for a Midnight Snack.
Even Children that you Love can be absolutely Gross sometimes.
I'm starting to get sick on my stomach just thinking about it. So I'd better Go for now
Myrtle has Cheerleader tryouts tommorow, It will take a real good nights sleep to deal with that .
Sincerely
Myrtles Father
posted by matt kevin jones at 6:47 PM
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